It started with a handful of pills. I waited, crying, chain smoking, absorbing every ounce of euphoria into my essence, begging, praying that it would stay. Stay with me for 30 days. I didn’t want to use. I didn’t want to be sober. I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to live. It ended … Continue reading Fall to my Knees
(Prompt from Suzi Banks Baum @ http://www.rebellesociety.com/2017/01/16/suzibanksbaum-practice/) When you lie in the dark Through sunset and sunrise Chalk ticks on the walls Marking time in your cell As if there would be an end Or that moments matter Forced into solitude Not by choice or free will Your only comrades The devils on guard … Continue reading The Holy Dwells in Dark Places
I hear a lot of advice from people about how the key to health is to stay positive and count your blessings. You can choose to be sad or choose to be happy. You can choose to dwell on your pain or choose to focus on your abilities. Maybe, but walk in my shoes and … Continue reading Truth and Lies (and how I survive)
I have no idea how I am still standing. How is it even possible to keep going when I am carrying so much? I beg my husband to tell me the truth. There has to be something more wrong with me, something I just can't see. I mean, besides what is obvious to me. I … Continue reading I’m a loser, baby.