Under the Influence

Frigid fog Relentlessly rising From warm mother Loyal as a dog Turns to ice When it touches my skin Promises spliced Into lapsed life Secrets buried Flashback of Drugged days Bitter taste Anemic amnesiac Miss you Let’s get together soon Sweet solicitations Remember me Drown me Choking on vows Cotton in my mouth Rabid teeth…… Continue reading Under the Influence

Ending

Too much time has passed I held a place in my heart for you Picked away at the scab to keep it open Time and tears prove strong It’s beginning to scar over The ache transforming to anger Too much time has passed The connection that held us together is stretched thin Beginning to fray…… Continue reading Ending

Collateral Damage

We lose friends. We are hurt by those meant to love us. We struggle to find answers. We will likely never have resolution. We might find comfort simply by accepting the reality We are just collateral damage.

No

What is this game you are playing I told you the rules Blinded by your sociopath Maliciously misguided Again you sink your venom Into my porcelain heart I’m already emaciated and haunted By your toxic curse And failing dream catcher Deluge of nightmares and tears Shaking and sweating Straightjacket struggle To hold onto sanity Damn…… Continue reading No

Heart of Gold

Another great quote for those of us that are struggling to understand the loss of friendships and relationships when we are chronically ill. There are a lot of us, which means that it is possible to find new people who can understand, lift us up and stand beside us. We deserve better and we have…… Continue reading Heart of Gold

Before she Leaves

Mom. I’m here. What are you doing? Trying to get up. Why? Because I’m going home. Not today mom. You have to stay here. Tell me what you did today? We visited the neighbors. And that Spanish man. Did he tell you about dinner? He is having dinner with dad. We have to get home…… Continue reading Before she Leaves

Stay

I know I changed. That was the point. I lost myself. Stuck in a rip tide, drowning in the dark. Treading water, gasping for air, grasping for life. And you knew I had a choice. Grab hold of hope or let go of living. You didn’t want me dead. Neither did I. Here I am.…… Continue reading Stay