Untied

There is a darkness tied up inside

Breaching the boundaries

Captivity amplified

It’s difficult to breath

Contaminating me

Skin and bones

With no one home

But for all

That should not be spoken

Teetering on the edge

Elaborate steps to prevent malice

From being woken

These are the secrets I keep

Lest a stir, a face, a sound, a place

Startles the unavowed

So I tip toe around myself

And everyone else

Perpetually panicked

Cutting and drinking and starving

To leak it out, drown it out, kill it out

Time and connection has shown me

It’s better to be quiet and lonely

Why is the silence so loud?

Stuck between solitude and kindness

And repressed

Brutal remembrance

If only

I hadn’t grown in a box made of wood and danger

Built by strangers

They were so good at pretending to care

Hold me in your thoughts and prayers

Or please just hold me

So I don’t fall apart

Like a work of abstract art

None of it fits quite right

With eyes that see what they should not

Ears only hear what they want

Hands hide truth behind your back

Hearts afraid to unpack

I’m bulging at the seams

Forsaking my dreams

Made of strings

Insidiously unraveling

Dangling

By a

Thread

Scissors whisper freedom

If I could just reach them

But I am

Shackled and shrouded

Awaiting

Life

Unclouded

And a safe space to hide

Biding time

Until I become

Untied

(Image from Tumblr)