Never Let Go

“Be who you needed when you were younger”

These few words carry the weight of the world for those of us that were hurt as children. Some of us were left behind, forced to carry too much, or were physically and emotionally hurt. Broken from birth at the hand of those who were meant to be our source of love and safety.

They held the most precious key. And they lost it. That irreplaceable, sacred key, misplaced somewhere within their own damaged hearts, spilled down on them from generations past. That damage set a course for our innocent little souls and cemented our destination into the darkness that is our now.

We work daily to find the detour from that path. And in doing so, we must provide ourselves with the pieces from childhood that were taken from us. Speak to ourselves as we wish our parents had. Be patient and kind when the world feels too big and too frightening. Hold our trembling selves and gently whisper in our ears, “I’m here, I love you, you are safe.”

Though that sacred key may have been misplaced, it is not hidden. It exists within the little child that has never left you. Look closely, you will see it glisten when the angle of the sun hits you in just the right way, hold onto it with all your might. And never let go.

(Quote by Janis Ian)

37 thoughts on “Never Let Go

  1. This was amazing! So honest, true and relatable. It gave me comfort and also reminded me of all the things I’ve not been doing to myself, for myself. I think for most of us, showing kindness to ourselves can be the hardest challenge of all. Being to ourselves, who we needed. Someone that didn’t save us or show us love when we needed it the most. Brilliantly written!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad you found it helpful Mike! I had a feeling it might resonate with what you are describing in your last post. It was something a therapist said to me when I was in treatment years ago. We missed out on critical needs in childhood and she suggested to me that I speak to myself as I would speak to a little child. Some of the things I say to myself, I would never even consider saying to a child and I deserve to be treated with the same kindness. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well, you were right — so thank you for suggesting it! I don’t think I could ever say those things to myself, but I guess it’s something I’ll have to learn to do. You’re right, though! 😃

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You’re welcome! It takes a lot of practice! I know I find myself sometimes just bashing myself or my world and have to really focus hard on changing that negative tape that keeps running in my head. Best wishes 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you very much for this. I think I need to reflect on exactly what this means to me, because in a way it hit hard for reasons I don’t completely understand. Maybe because more recently in particular I am more the parent than the child than my own parents are in our relationship(s). Somehow I feel there is insight hidden in your words.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think it will mean something different to everyone. For me, it’s about healing myself and part of that is parenting myself in the way that my parents did not. I am also in a place where my parents are now elderly and needing care. I will help them with care-taking, but one of my boundaries with them is that I will not be responsible for their emotional well-being. As they have aged, they have become aware of the damage they caused when I was a child and are now feeling guilt. That is theirs to carry, not mine. I hope the post is helpful to you in some way and I’m happy to talk with you about some more if you are feeling stuck with it. Best wishes ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is beautiful and touched my heart deeply, as I had a very unpleasant childhood to put it mildly. But now I’m a mother and didn’t think I was going to be. My daughter is 21 months and the love of my life. I try to give her what I didn’t have and it reminds me to give that same love to that inner wounded child inside me.

    Loved this, great post it made me teary. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, I’m glad that it touched you deeply. Sometimes the most important lessons we learn from our parents are what not to do – and to end that cycle of abuse or neglect. And yes, to be able to give your child the best world possible, you must give to yourself the same love and security that you did not receive as a child. Your daughter is lucky to have you as her momma ❤

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Yes, it does do some good. They are issues that I have worked really hard on for a long time. Just hadn’t thought about it, for whatever reason, until I saw that quote. I’m good, just back from walking the dogs and took time to splash in the creek – a great childhood memory ❤

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Ah, such things like that can be really good: I find that getting back to nature (long walks) clears and calms my brain: I used to go on long walks a lot when a kid and have only just got back into it.
            It’s certainly interesting how a mere few words can stir up something in our psyches, too.

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Yes, we are fortunate to live in the country and I just love nature and animals. It always makes me feel better. And yes to the few little words too… you never know what is going to hit you (I guess that’s partly why I have anxiety, lol).

              Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s